I swear it kinda creeps me out that I’ve been updating a little too often for my own good these past few weeks but heh, the shoot for our new show starts on Monday and I pretty much would be internet-less for 4 days a week for the next 2 months. Dangyunhaji’d!!!

Anyway, I bring you the last installment of my Palawan Experience videos. I warn you that we went swimming, hence, we were wearing swimming clothes. Shuddup. Stop laughing. >_> Also, we went karaoke-ing, where I pwned them with my rendition of Britney Spears’ Sometimes and Joey Potter’s On My Own but P0yt kicked all of our asses.

If you have noticed, I don’t really post much pictures of myself on this blog- but that doesn’t mean I’m not narcissistic. Yebbah. I like to have my photos taken though most of the time I look like I’m on crack, hence, I don’t really post ‘em here for fear that a talent scout might stumble upon this blog of lol and it might jeopardize my potential modeling career. Whoohoo.

This will probably be one of the few times I’d be posting my photos here anyway so uhm… enjoy? Good luck? Errr… Take care? Pislabenrakenrol? (Also, I put crack!captions for each pic, according to what I was thinking just before the photographer clicked the camera.)

Photos by Cathy Laqui

“Who ate my hipon? Huhuhu…”

WARNING: This post is extremely long. And it has no pictures.

There was once a girl so ugly, she’d sometimes just look at herself in the mirror and cry. ‘A face only a mother could love’? Psssh! Screw that. Because even her own mom never thought she was pretty. Well, actually she used to be a cute kid until she turned seven and it was all downhill from there.

Her classmates would call her names like “tamby” (walis tambo), or “wooly” (steel wool), or “skurry” (Scary Spice) because of her dry, unruly mane, which was so fucked up, it was often mistaken for pubic hair. She’d often sit in a corner with furrowed eyebrows and wonder what the hell was wrong… until many many years later, she would discover the miracle we all call shampoo and conditioner.

Her teeth wasn’t the nicest in the world, too. She’s congenitally anodonsic and had a Madonna-gap between her upper front teeth. And so, in mid-puberty she wore braces and basically looked like Betty La Fea for 4 1/2 years.

This said ugly girl also had utmost hate for her complexion. Living in a society where people associate fair skin with beauty (uhm, hello German Moreno? Yachang?), her dark skin (DARK, mmmkay? Not olive. She’s no Jennifer Lopez) had always been a disadvantage. She had tried to many ways make it more… white and obviously failed miserably because one cannot bask under the sun and expect to be as translucent divine as the JaBoom twins. Also, she found out that leaving soap to dry or using industrial-level loofah to scrub skin with don’t work for shit.