Scary Kitchen Stories

I am a very non-domisticated girl, just want to make that clear. I know more names of Japanese gay AV stars than I do household chores. Sad, really. But I won’t get into details anymore so as not to further embarrass myself but yeah, I’m not anywhere near settling down.

However, I’m currently liking a guy. Like really. Yiheeeeeeee! *nudge nudge* (yes, I just teased my own self because I’m mature like that) and I find my self wanting to learn how to cook so I can feed him with my awesome Filipino dishes and he’d be like “OMG KRING YOU ARE AN AWESOME GIRL!”. Yes, Flip food specifically because they don’t really have that where he lives.

So far, I only know how to cook 3 dishes, (besides your usual sunny side up, hot dog and other fried stuff) – RICE, YEMA and TUNA PESTO PASTA. Are rice and yema even considered “dishes”? Anyway few months ago I learned how to cook Adobong Manok, not from this guy. I asked my mom how to do it because I felt bad that some American dude who can’t even pronounce “manok” properly knows how to cook our national dish better than I do.

Not the guy I like but if you know this man, please tell him I’d love to have cooking lessons with him. One-on-one.

But I have a problem though. ME + KITCHEN = DISASTER. I remember I was cooking the tuna pesto thing one time and instead of using olive oil, I poured soybean oil. You know, the stuff the chefs use when they want to look kick-ass and shit and make their pans go fire-y? And so, the poor, undomisticated kid that I was pretty much freaked out and put my pan under running water. BIG MISTAKE. The flame got bigger and almost burnt the cabinets above our sink.

If I don’t go burning the house down, I normally cut myself, peeling fruits or just opening cans. I win at life, okay?

I guess what I’m trying to say is, I never liked Home Economics classes nor did I watch cooking shows growing up. I can’t differentiate a skillet from a chopping board and I honestly thought, until recently that coriander is some sort of an amphibian. Hell, I can even count the number of times I’ve worn an apron in my life! But I don’t know why all of a sudden I want to learn how to cook. Maybe ‘coz on Idol, I rooted for David Cook? Why am I so fakken corny? Who are you?

So guys, if you have any recipes you can share with me, I’d really appreciate them. I know I can find many online but it’s not… personal. X_x I’d ask my mom, too and hope that she won’t get frustrated with me when I unevenly cut the potatoes for sisig. Wait, you don’t put potatoes in sisig. Fail.

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