18 Year Old and Stupid

First and foremost, I’d just like to say “What the hell. It’s March already?! Where the eff did my January and February go?!”… And now that that’s outta my chest, let’s get down to business.

In about 4 months, I’d be turning a year old again. I kinda dread the thought but I can’t really do much about it, can I? This whole I’m-getting-old thing is starting to get to me though, especially with this lingering single-hood and my not-so-skinny body, which reminds me that I’m not getting any younger whenever I look at it in the mirror every morning. It reminds me, too that I should work-out and stop drinking too much.

Sure, it does suck to grow old but I wouldn’t we want to be 18 and stupid forever either. Not that I was stupid when I was 18 but years and experiences do add to one’s “wisdom” and smarts. Looking back, I realized that there were a lot of things that I badly wanted to do when I was much younger that I’m glad I didn’t, for one reason or another.

Date Guys

I don’t really mean “not date guys” in general because I honestly wish I did, but there were quite a few that I really really liked back then and now I’d see them on social networking sites and go “WTF was I thinking? Was my taste that bad?” Oh, yeah. I know you know what I mean.

There was this guy that looked like a fucking chameleon, you won’t even believe it. I didn’t really like him but I overheard from a friend’s classmate’s brother’s dentist’s aunt that he was crushing on me. Another had a major body odor but at that time I attributed that to puberty. One guy I liked had “douchebag” stamped on his forehead and I almost had gone crazy with this unbelievably pretty boy who eventually admitted that he prefers men and enjoys butt sex.

Get a Tattoo

I’m sure a lot of you have considered getting a tattoo and I did, too. Done properly and with the right motivation, they can look pretty cool and can define one’s character. I’m glad I didn’t though, especially when I was younger and didn’t have a sense of who I was yet.

I remember telling my friends in grade 4 that I wanted to get one, inspired by those gory temporary tats you could buy at sari-sari stores. Like an image of worms crawling on an eyeball or a bloodied knife stabbed on a grinning skull- ON MY ARM LIKE ROSANNA ROCES. I also wanted to have the name of Nick Carter tattooed around my belly button and I swear I’d kill myself now if I ever did.

Do Drugs

I mean, seriously. Do I even need to elaborate on this one? Yes? Well, you’re an idiot kthnxbi.

Go to Japan to Study

It’s not a secret that I love Japan. A couple of years back though I got so obsessed with the country that I got fascinated with anything related to it. I self-studied the language, familiarized my self with the food, illegally downloaded watched the dorama and eiga, listened to nothing but Jpop and attended conventions and events associated with the Japanese. And yes, I did consider becoming an exchange student there, too.

However, to do that, I would’ve had to skip a year or so in school and I’d have to say goodbye to my chances of graduating with honors. And so I ditched the idea, which worked for the better because honestly, what the hell was I gonna go there for to study? There aren’t even a lot of female practitioners in the film/tv industry and it will make no sense for my career. Plus, I can always go there anytime and pwn the people with my “kimochii!”.

Become a Professional Dancer

Not that there’s anything wrong with being a professional dancer and believe me, I honestly thought I was going to be one. But the desire to be a superstar was much stronger so I decided to be an actress instead. Well, not really.

When I was younger, I was into dancing a lot though I never had a formal training. You can ask my high school friends and they’d tell you that I was the happiest kid in the world whenever I was in front of a crowd, performing my ass off (usually in stupid costumes but I didn’t care). But in college, I realized that I can actually write and do videos and do crazy shit on cam, which can pass off as entertainment. Hence, my job now.

Marry an F4

Yes, you read that right. F4 as in the guys of Meteor Garden circa 2003. To say that I was a fan of the boys is an understatement. I lived and breathed F4 for a whole year. I don’t want to get into details but let’s just say that I honestly, seriously believed that I was going to marry Zai Zai aka Vic Zhou aka Hua Ze Lei.

My barkada were witnesses to how fixated I was on the idea that everything I did was but another step towards that goal.

“I’m sorry, what do you want to happen again?”, asked my friend, Mishi.
I answered with a smile, “Marry ZaiZai and live in a big farm with him in Taiwan. You know, raise chickens, cows…” (ZaiZai once said in an interview that he’d like to live in a farm in the countryside with his wife/family).

I saw her eye twitch before she asked, “So what will you do if he asks you to run off to the sunset with him now?”
“I’ll drop school and totally give him my life.”, said I, with full conviction and a glimmer in my eyes.

True story. Lolz.

Please don’t look at me funny. I know that the chances of a random Taiwanese actor asking me to marry him is slimmer than an anorexic’s body but back then, I didn’t really know any better. Boy am I glad I’m not so naive anymore… Wait, I did say I wasn’t stupid when I was 18, right? I take that back.

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Also, PLEASE WATCH THIS BECAUSE IT’S SO MUCH BETTER THAN PORN!

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