10 Things I Hate About My Boyfriend

I would’ve put this on the My Korean Boyfriend blog but I feel like he deserves this spot on FunnySexy! JejeKim, I don’t think you have the slightest idea how much I hate you.

I hate your fashion sense, or lack thereof. Sometimes I wonder if you’re really Korean because Koryan guys are supposed to be “fashionable”, right? But your style is non-existent reminds me of a 16 year old boy who was forced to sell insurance. I thought we already agreed that I’ll be your coordi noona? Why do you always put back on the rack the clothes that I pick for you?!?!

I hate the fact that you’re not romantic. I have always imagined my future boyfriend to be all suave and shit like Fabio, and perhaps has even mastered the Spanish language. But nooo! Sweet as you are, you have never serenaded me, written me love letters or even baked me a simple chocolate canelle de bordeaux!

I hate your eyes because they’re four times smaller than mine. But your face is twice bigger!

And I wasn’t even wearing contact lenses!

I hate that when you were still in Korea, you had Prada bag and sneakers and you bought a Bulgari pendant, Ferragamo sunglasses, Gucci belt and god knows what other designer things you had back then when now, you’re too kuripot to buy training shoes worth more than Php1800!!!!!! WHAT.

I hate it when you get drunk because you throw up like you own the damned vehicle and you come barging into the ladies’ room just so you could yell “Kring, mahal kitaaaa!” and yet sometimes you totally forget about my existence and you just strip down to your boxers and like pass out or something.

And I hate the way you snore at night sometimes because well, nobody likes that anyway.

I hate that you don’t teach me how to speak Korean when you know that I’m dying to use my Hangukeo skills to seduce a certain member of Big Bang. And how am I supposed to know if random skanky Korean girls are already flirting with you? Aha! Is that why you don’t want me to learn? Now I hate you more!

I hate the fact that you’re always irritated. With the heat, the pollution, the barking dogs on the street. But mostly with the heat. Why are you in Manila again?

I hate that you (and 98% of the Korean population) ALWAYS think Korea is the best in everything. Hey, we may not have our own global electronics company, we don’t produce our own cars, we don’t export underaged idols who are victims of exploitation but we have the best beaches in the world. The best singers ever. And our own David Beckham.

Park Ji-sung? Who’s that?

I hate the fact that you and everyone else who’d get to read this know that I’m just shitting with my self and I just wasted 1 hour of my life writing about the things that I hate about you when really, even if I try, I cannot get my self to hate you. Or anything about you, for that matter. Because whoohoo, surprise surprise, I LOVE YOU! And I’ve come to accept that your quirks and your “negative traits” make up the awesome person that you are (and it’s not like I’m close to being perfect anyway).

And yes, I sound like a googley-eyed high schooler who’s been swept off her feet so Imma shut up now. But really, bebe. I’m very thankful to God that I have you in my life. Happy Valentine’s Day to us! Here’s to 100000x Valentines more!

ps: Hate is a strong word. Obviously, I used it as a figure of speech. Or whatever it’s called. XD Spread the love, bitches!

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