If you know Mr. Ninomiya Kazunari, please tell him that I love him. I may not be “in love” with him but I love him. So bad. I’m aware that there are a hundred million other fangirls around the world who probably say the same thing, who proclaim their undying love for him by flashing their boobies screaming their lungs out during concerts and buying every single version of their albums… In the greater scheme of things, I know that am but a nobody.

Please tell him, however that despite the fact that I haven’t met him in person and that there’s clearly a huge language barrier between us (the only Japanese phrases I’ve perfected are “Hai. Sou desu.” and “Ganbarimasu! Fight-o!”), he had affected me in ways a lot of people won’t even understand. I fell for him hard the first time I watched his performace of Konseki. I think I died that night when I realized he wrote that song himself. And the more I listened to his self-made music, the more I found myself getting lost in his awesomeness.

- I thought of making a disclaimer that this is a non-male-bashin’ post but I decided not to. Take it however you want and please don’t make assumptions as to what evoked me to write this entry. -

“Akala ko iba ka. Akala ko ‘di ka tulad nila. Wala ka rin palang bayag. (I thought you were different. I thought you were not one of them. You, too, don’t have balls afterall.)”

I have long realized that one of the major reasons why I’m not too lucky with guys is because I think I have bigger balls than many of them. Sorry if this sounds cocky lolz. cock and balls in one paragraph ftw! but maybe, just maybe, it’s ‘coz I hang out with people my age, most of whom are still very insecure. I do not discount the fact, however, that (and I’ve been told this by A LLOOOTTT of people) I can be fierce and intimidating and look like I’m ready to slice off peens anytime.

But yeah, one of my pet peeves are guys without balls and I do mean that figuratively. I don’t discriminate against eunuchs and castrati, okay? I even made a list of the different kids of GWB’s (guys without balls) for mah ladies so they can stay away from ‘em.

1. “I have no balls that’s why I can’t fight for you.”

So you’ve been dating this guy and things are going well between both of you and then all of a sudden, over dinner, he tells you that you should stop seeing each other. Whoah WTF. Where’d that come from? Like a total wuss that he is, he then apologizes and explains that his friends and family talked to him about you and gave their disapproval (because you’re Pinoy and he’s Chinese or he’s from an affluent family and you’re not or they learned about your past and his mom went berserk).

I’m not saying I’m the biggest fan of the “you and me against the world” kind of relationships but why go out in the first place with someone whom you know your family would disapprove of? Oh, right. ‘Coz you’re an idiot.

-That chick on the video may or may not be me-

The last time I took an IQ test (a few months ago), I got a score of 127. It’s supposedly “superior”, with only about 6.7% of the population having IQ that high. Well, yeah. I took it on tickle, the same website which has tests to find out whether you’re a pirate or a ninja or who your red carpet match is. Truly, it’s reliable.

So when my boss, who happens to be the prez of Mensa Philippines asked me to take the test, I was obviously hesitant. I mean, what if I fail? What if I’m not Top 2% material? What if I find out that in reality my IQ level is really… 65? In the end I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, gathered up my courage and decided to take it because I know that no matter what happens, Mensa or no Mensa, Imma be a star… LOLZ.

Mensa is the largest, oldest, and best known high-IQ society in the world. It is a non-profit organization open to people who score at the 98^th percentile or higher on a standardized, supervised intelligence test.

98%. Deym.